This week: Twitter garbled Chirp

Someday we will all speak gibberashi in Tweetspurts while jindangling oodalicious pots of moolah at Twitteronia’s roolerz.

Once upon a time, about a few days ago in fact, there was a fantabulous conference attended by anxious herds of sheepolopers, all worried about the Twitterverse and its Twitteronic leaders.

Ah, screw it. Jabberwocky is way cooler.

Twitter, a site that let’s people drip verbal diarrhea in 140 characters or less, had a conference this week. It was called Chirp. First conference of its kind. The assembled hangers ons and talking heads picked up the scent of fear among developers who have built applications around Twitter, and its followers.

There’s one that let’s you take a photo on your iPhone and share it on Twitter. There is the one that got bought by Twitter, Tweetie, a mobile app that let’s you manage multiple accounts. I could go on, but I would have to slit my wrists.

They feared that Twitter was going to invade their turf and take it over. Although that is what you have to expect if you build your business around someone else’s distribution chain. They might just gobble you up, if you are lucky, or they’ll, more than likely, do what you do and bundle it in with what they do.

Oh, yeah, I nearly forgot, the Twittronic leaders said that they will charge businesses and promote paid tweets. The Twitteronic CFO told the BBC:

“We’ve had offers for significant amounts of money to run display advertising on Twitter and on the ecosystem but we’re just not interested in that as a vehicle. It is not innovative. It is not organic to the way people use Twitter.”

Apparently, irony is completely missing from the Twitterverse. However, there will be wonderful 140 character ditties from the likes of Starbucks and Best Buy, gently floating up to the surface, like turds in the toilet bowl of life.

That,in a nutshell, is what happened. Took me over 10 tweets to spew, but I am not apologizing.  Apparently, it took up a whole chunk of the Internets this last few days. Someone has to explain that to me one day.

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