Yes, Disney rides are headed to a theater near you

If you follow the movie industry, you may notice a number of Disney rides have been in development to become films – even with the diminishing returns of the Pirates of the Caribbean. 

Movies include those based on The Matterhorn, The Magic Kingdom (which will be the next film from Iron Man/Cowboys and Aliens helmer Jon Faverau, with a script by Pulitzer prize winning novelist Michael Chabon), The Haunted Mansion (to be helmed by Guillermo Del Toro), and The Enchanted Tiki Room (with a script by Frank Zappa’s son Ahmet).


There’s of course two sides (or more) to this coin. Your first knee-jerk reaction is probably, sheesh, Hollywood’s really scraping the bottom of the barrel. There’s so many filmmakers out there that actually have something to say that are desperate to have their voices heard, and Hollywood’s still making this nonsense? 

Not to mention Hollywood’s also been planning a number of movies based on board games like Battleship, which is due next year, Monopoly, which may be helmed by Ridley Scott, and Candyland. And at least one struggling writer friend of mine has joked about one day there being Hungry Hungry Hippos the movie, but I wouldn’t be surprised to see it on the cover of Variety tomorrow.


Then again, with the talent involved in some of these potential movies, maybe there is some real potential with some of them. I, for one, absolutely thought a movie based on the Pirates of the Caribbean ride was an extremely stupid idea – butthe first one certainly turned out all right. 

The Enchanted Tiki Tiki Room is a fun little attraction, and maybe Ahmet Zappa can turn it into a cool Jungle Book style story for kids. We haven’t had an Abominable Snowman movie in ages, and maybe the Matterhorn could bring it back in a new way.


Michael Chabon and Jon Faverau are both very talented people that could make a great combination together. And I’d certainly be curious to see what Benicio Del Toro could do with The Haunted Mansion. (And I hope he brings back that great Paul Frees narration that guides us through the house when you go to Disneyland.)


Of course, most of us would prefer if there were different, original movies to see, and for Hollywood to quit spending so much money remakes/ reboots of tired old TV shows, movies, comic books, video games, etc.

If these movies don’t have anything original, different or cool to offer, it could be like the joke in Back to School where Rodney Dangerfield tells off the stuffy business professor who has no real world experience.

Where can a tried, silly movie based on an amusement park ride with nothing original to offer be a huge blockbuster? To quote Rodney D, “How about Fantasyland?”