Medea touts interactive vodka bottle

Are you a wayward misanthrope who eschews human contact, but is tired of drinking alone nonetheless? Well, now you can have your vodka and drink it too!

That’s right, folks. Medea has introduced an ice-cold, ultra-premium Dutch vodka packaged in the world’s first customizable, interactive bottle.

The bottle’s (hic, or is that bootle’s?) embedded LED display can be programmed with scrolling, witty text messages that will provide rambling alcoholics with the illusion of a coherent conversation.

But, like much of the finer things in life, Medea doesn’t come cheap. 

No, this talkative bottle will set you back a cool $40-$50 for a mere 750ml. 

Still, $50 isn’t all that unreasonable, especially since the battery-powered display is removable, submergible, freezer-proof and reusable. 

So, why not put down that chilled glass of Grey Goose or Smirnoff and give Medea a try. 

C’mon, you know you want to!