American scientists just can’t get enough porn

It seems as if scientists working for the Almighty Federal Government just can’t get enough porn to satisfy their chronic smut addictions.

Yes, indeed, the National Science Foundation is again facing hard questions about whether employees are surfing for porn on the government’s time and the taxpayer’s dime.

According to the Washington Times, Iowa Republican Sen. Charles E. Grassley informed top NSF officials that he was recently contacted by three unnamed whistleblowers about continuing porn problems at the foundation.

Grassley also expressed concern that senior NSF execs caught perusing graphic anatomical depictions were punished more severely than lower-level peons.

“One of the whistleblowers [who] approached my staff raised concerns about possible disparities in disciplinary actions at NSF when it comes to viewing pornography,” Grassley wrote in a scathing letter to the NSF.

“In particular, my staff was advised that higher-level employees are treated differently than lower-level employees for the same or similar offense.

“More specifically, three whistleblowers have now provided me with credible evidence supporting the allegation that NSF employees continue to access pornography.”



However, NSF spokeswoman Maria Zacharias refuted Grassley’s allegations, stating that all pornographic offenders had been disciplined within the (undoubtedly lax) guidelines of the foundation’s administrative system. 

Zacharias also insisted that the pornography problems – which first surfaced in 2008 – have been “fixed.”

“There have been zero instances,” she said.

It should be noted that investigators had previously seized 5,297 image and video files on just one employee’s work computer – with more than 360 containing “inappropriate” clips lasting up to a half-hour long.



In addition, investigators confirmed that a senior NSF executive had spent at least 331 days looking at his extensive pornography collection and chatting with naked women.  



When confronted, the executive claimed that his online chats with nude or partially clad individuals helped provide a living to impoverished women overseas.