Sixty-year-old woman stabs boyfriend for cheating at Monopoly

There’s a woman in New Mexico who apparently takes her Monopoly very seriously. She repeatedly stabbed her boyfriend after accusing him of cheating at the classic board game.

According to The Smoking Gun, 60-year-old Laura Chavez and her boyfriend were playing Monopoly at her apartment in Santa Fe when things got out of hand. Chavez allegedly admitted to stabbing her man, Clyde “Butch” Smith, with a kitchen knife.


Police reported that both Chavez and the 48-year-old Smith showed signs of being intoxicated. Cops found Smith bleeding profusely from wounds on his head and right wrist; he was hospitalized in stable condition.


Smith told investigators that initially Chavez smashed him in the head with a glass bottle and then “grabbed a knife and began cutting him, causing injuries to the top of his head, neck, left eye brow and right wrist area.”


When cops arrived at Chavez’s apartment building, she was under the porch “covered with suspected blood.” When asked if the blood was Smith’s, she answered, “Yes, I f***** him up.”


Chavez went to jail on a multitude of charges, like aggravated battery on a household member with a deadly weapon and battery on a law enforcement officer. There’s no word on whether or not she passed go. She’s being held in the Santa Fe county slammer on a $5,000 bond.


Chavez’s 10-year-old grandson had been playing with them, and he told the officers that his grandmother started arguing with Smith because she was under the impression that he “was cheating at Monopoly,” according to a probable cause statement. The boy went to bed before the stabbing occurred, and he was not able to give further details about the alleged cheating.


Was he pinching money from the bank, or did he collect $200 before passing go?


Mr. Monopoly would be saddened to see such behavior, if he were real.