Facebook faints at sight of nipples

Those delicate little flowers at Facebook have been swooning in shock at the sight of nipples – on a porcelain doll.

Breaking out the smelling salts and flapping their little fans wildly, one assumes, Facebook staff have apparently had their sensibilities deeply offended.

The company has sent no fewer than six messages to Sydney jeweller Victoria Buckley over the last three days, ordering her to remove some pictures from her Facebook page.

The pictures concerned, it must be admitted, do look slightly creepy to the unsophisticated eye.

Buckley likes to display her jewellery alongside a jointed porcelain doll. While the doll may not be to everybody’s taste, though, it’s certainly not regarded as pornographic by its Canadian creator, who sells them for thousands of dollars.

To find ‘Ophelia’ offensive, Buckley believes, is simply ‘American puritanism’. She says she’s had an A4 version of the image – as well as the doll herself – on display for months in her shop window without a word of complaint.

She points out that pictures of Michelangelo’s David are widely available on Facebook – and that his dangly bits, while undersized by some standards, are surely no less offensive than a doll’s nipples.

“I feel I have a right to photograph my jewellery with Ophelia as I see fit. Facebook disagrees with this, because, even if hundreds of people appreciate what you do, it only takes one complaint to have the whole thing taken down. They have removed the original photos from my page,” she says.

“We are talking about representations of nipples – not photos of real women.”

Buckley has slapped black bars across the offending images on her main Facebook page, but has started a new, XXX-rated one to gauge the company’s response.

Those of a delicate disposition should approach with caution.