What do you buy the man who has everything? Well, you could start with the incredible Wally Hermes Yacht, the WHY as it is known in classier circles. It is awesome because it is different and expensive and it is decorated in silk scarves left over from falling Duty Free sales on airplanes. It is awesome because it is wider than it is long, unlike your average yacht, thereby allowing for ridiculous show-off space at the back.
This is where you can drape your high priced escorts, your supermodels, and freeloading movie stars. It is a big middle finger to the rest of the world. Is this the best Christmas gift ever, or what! It is a 58m x 38m triumph of feel goodiness. Heck, the designers are also touting its ecological credibility: photovoltaic panels on the hull and roof, natural light flooding the interior, some new fangled heat recovery stuff for the engine. Rich people love to save the rest of us from their excesses.
But, the good Lord, in his infinite wisdom, has found balance because it is called the Wally. Wally is not a name that any rich person should have to have emblazoned on anything. It is a poor person brand. Wally’s BBQ Shack. Wally’s 99 Cent Store. Wally’s Wieners. But then, in jumped Beelzebub, with Hermes. He just couldn’t let it go. Hermes has an accent on it, but I can’t do that on my keyboard without breaking something so, I am not going to try. Just take my word for it. Hermes is classy. There is no Hermes tank top. There are no Hermes donut shops. The Wally Hermes Yacht is all things to all men proving that girth is more important than length, once and for all.